Friday, March 4, 2016

Lucifer Recap, Season 1 Episode 5


Fabulous music. Whoever is in charge of the song selection for this show should get an award. It's spectacular. The rest of the episode is so-so, but at least the music is good. My favorite song in this episode is "A Little Bit Wicked" by Valerie Broussard.

Lucifer and Maze are attending a fashion show...for wedge sneakers that cost $6000 a pair. Maze reminds Lucifer that he got hurt when Chloe shot him. Lucifer seems excited by the prospect of getting hurt. Maze's side-eye is, as always, epic.

Lucifer makes out with a model in the back. It's a really cute scene ("What is your darkest desire?" "A cheeseburger.") However, his make out session is interrupted when someone starts shooting into the crowd. Maze drags him out. They find a dead girl on the floor on their way out.

Cut to the police station where Chloe explains that a girl was trampled to death when the shooting started. I calls BS because the fashion show didn't have enough people to have anyone trampled to death. Seriously, as if skeletally-thin fashion people could trample anything. But who cares, right? This is Lucifer. The mysteries don't have to make sense.

Mr. Morningstar shows up at the police station and convinces the chief of police to bring him in as a consultant. What is the police chief's darkest desire? Political support from minority constituents. Finally, a rogue drop of realism makes it into this show. Lucifer promises political support. The trampling death will the chief's big close.

Okay, color me skeptical here. This is L.A. Their big case is a girl getting trampled? No way. It's not even a real murder. Like in the paparazzi episode, the main case is just an accident. That's kind of disappointing.

But the trampling case means that Chloe is stuck with Lucifer. She has to interview the sneaker designer and Lucifer can get her in. I don't see why. The guy's a witness to a death so the L.A.P.D. should be able to get an interview without Satan's help. But, whatever. They get on the elevator and she slaps him.

This is good. Also, Chloe's hair is amazing.

They go interview the designer who has a peg pig and an ex-Marine bodyguard. Lucifer was the one who gave the designer his first break. This makes perfect sense. Only the devil would back a fashion line that made wedge sneakers. The designer had a beef with the Latin Kings. He used to belong to a gang called the Asian Boys and there's conflict between the two groups.

After the interview Chloe and Lucifer head to a police bar. Chloe is afraid that the girl's death may start a gang war. Lucifer seems excited at the prospect. I try to wrap my head around the idea of the Latin Kings (who are, like most big gangs, actually fairly business-like criminals) going to war over an accidental death at a fashion show. It seems ludicrous. Someone is mean to Chloe about her old Palmetto case. Lucifer beats them up.

Maze goes to Starbucks and meets Archangel Douchebag. It's a fabulous scene. Maze tells him that she wants to go home. Wait, she'd rather live in Hell than in L.A.? How can that be? It's the traffic, right?

Douchebag tells her that, if she works with him, he can make sure that she gets back to Hell. She whines that Lucifer doesn't talk to her anymore and  tells him to go talk to Dr. Martin. I don't understand why Douchebag doesn't just get Maze promoted to Queen of Hell. That would be awesome.

Archangel Douchebag goes to see Dr. Martin. The scene is adorable (I love Dr. Martin). Douchebag introduces himself as a psychiatrist who just moved to the office next door. Dr. Martin looked like someone who just won the "cute neighbor" lottery.

Cut to Lux. Maze and Lucifer are chatting. I love the repartee. Lucifer tells Maze that she exists to protect him, whether she wants to or not. This is a lovely, albeit confusing, bit of worldbuilding. I love the idea of Maze as a "guardian demon," but I don't really get why that would be necessary. Lucifer was the most powerful of angels. He's weirdly underpowered in this show, and I'm not sure why. Maybe his power got sucked out with his wings?

Chloe's ex-husband shows up at the club and tells Lucifer that he has to protect Chloe. Apparently, he's also worried about the gang war. They seem to be serious about this gang war thing. Guys, enough. The titeritos do kill over sneakers, but the real gangsters don't.

Lucifer and Chloe are in the car on their way to do some detecting. They mention the gang war again. The Great Latin Kings Wedge Sneaker War of 2016 seems to be a thing. Sigh.

Chloe locks Lucifer into her car and goes to an East L.A. bungalow to ask some questions. The gang members (one is a girl) are making out and don't open the door. Chloe hears a scream and breaks in to find the gang members in bed and Lucifer sitting on a chair on the other side of the room.

The victim was the gang leader's cousin. He starts to cry. He tells them that the fashion designer had betrayed a gangster called "Yellow Viper." Viper is out of prison and is trying to kill the designer. Apparently we're supposed to be appalled by this. I don't see why. The guy makes $6,000 wedge sneakers. He deserves to die.

They get a call from the designer. Someone else is dead. Turns out someone killed the fashion designer's pet pig. They tell him Yellow Viper is out of prison. The designer tells them that Viper is dangerous and he just won't stop.

[cue Miley Cyrus music]

I'm bored. I have a hard time getting excited about an accidental death, and I don't care about the sneaker designer guys. The Viper can have him.

Luckily the next scene is Archangel Douchebag asking Dr. Martin out for a "professional consultation." The double entendres run fast and hard. It's a great scene.

Back to Chloe and Lucifer. There's some cute banter. Turns out Yellow Viper is now a graffiti artist teaching kids how to deface public buildings.

Okay. I guess we're supposed to feel sentimental about this. I'm not sure why. Vandalism is vandalism. You want to be artsy? Set up an account at DeviantArt.

The Latin Kings show up. The gang war is three cars, a guy with spray paint cans, and a bunch of kids. The Latin Kings seem to be willing to kill Viper and his kids to get revenge for a trampling death. I'm astonished by the sheer stupidity of this plot line. The victim wasn't even a gang member. She was someone's cousin.

Lucifer tries to talk the Latin Kings out of the massacre but insulting their pants. It doesn't work. Lucifer is about to get shot (again) when the lights go out and a shadowy figure starts beating up the gang members. It's Maze and she's awesome. Seriously, this scene is worth the whole stupid plot line.

Cops show up. They find a gun on Viper that is the same caliber as the gun used at the show. The case seems to have been cleared up, but Chloe has doubts. Lucifer seems excited about this. Chloe tells him that he's addicted to chaos and has a god complex. The god thing seems to upset Lucifer.

Lucifer goes to see the designer, who gives him a painting as a present. Chloe shows up with Viper. It turns out that the designer set up the shooting as a way to get rid of Viper, who he saw as competition.

Wait, how is a graffiti artist competing with a sneaker designer? How? Anyway, the designer was really serious about the competition thing. He even killed his own pet pig.

Truly a monster.

Lucifer, however, doesn't seem upset about this. He's upset because the designer is a "fake." I'm not sure what he means by this. The guys schtick is that he's a tough gangster making really stupid sneakers. He just tried to frame a rival and put him in prison. He almost started a gang war. That seems pretty authentic to me. I mean, he even killed a pig.

The Police Chief gets good press. Lucifer is an official civilian consultant to the L.A.P.D. He and Chloe are now partners. All's well that ends well.

Cut to Lux. Lucifer is talking to Maze. She tells him that she'll always protect him, no matter what the danger.

Chloe's bedroom. She's sleeping in a chair (a very ugly one, btw) when Maze approaches. We see Maze's true face. Chloe wakes up.

This is a fantastic scene set. Words can't really do it justice. They play Edwyn Collins' Girl Like You and it's eerie and creepy and fantastic. Great job.

End of episode.

I'm not sure how I feel about this show. The mysteries suck. There's barely any supernatural content, and the world building makes no sense. The characters, however, are fantastic and the banter is funny and cute. I really like it.